What Would Don Draper Do?
Questions for Don? email: whatwoulddondraperdo@gmail.com
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96.
Know your assets and aphorisms well: when one is in Indian country, one needs a man who knows Indians.
95. Dear Don Draper, I'm going to finish college in a few months. I have no idea what I want to do and no current employment or job prospects. I live at home with my mother and spend most of my time reading books and watching movies. How do I go somewhere in life?
Enlist. Or pick the books and movies you like best and apply at the companies who produce them. If you have no experience, offer to work as an intern. Either way, keep your head down and work as hard as you can.
94.
Throw that beer can any old place.
93.
Don’t let her leave the house dressed like that.
92.
Tell her to stop talking. If she won’t, tie her to the bed and leave.
91. Dear Don Draper, Do you have any views on men using Facebook?
Yes, the same ones I have of men wearing brassieres.
90. Dear Don Draper, My college sweetheart is the most exciting, intelligent and beautiful woman I'll ever meet. And she knows it. Everything has to be on her terms - she's in her early twenties and at her peak. At what point do you give up on the woman you love?
When everything must be on her terms. Particularly if she’s in her early twenties. You’re too young to know if she’s the best you’ll ever meet. Once you leave campus, your eyes will be cursed with a better woman every day.
89.
Always move forward.
88. Dear Don Draper, How do you feel about "Gossip Girl"?
I don’t feel a thing, but I don’t mind watching. Voiceover narration is a difficult device to pull off. When it fails, it’s grating. And while an annoying gossip columnist makes sense, it’s not interesting. There’s no twist there. Just irritation. I’ll admit bias: I take my reputation seriously. I find it difficult to connect with the fantasy of being a public figure.
87.
Judge a secretary by her ability to keep things off your desk.
86.
Skip out on fireworks with your family to call your girlfriend. Then head home for a glass of milk.
85. Dear Don Draper, I'm considering a long distance relationship with a woman who lives across the country from me. She's fantastic, but is it worth the distance and expense?
I like the idea of entering into any relationship with an assumed distance. A comfortable remove is a wise position. ‘Long’ sounds too far for comfort.
84.
If you’re in a jam, call Peggy.
83. Dear Don Draper, What would you do if a television network discouraged the free advertising written by fans on a social networking site?
This reminds me of yesterday: Salvatore mentioned something oddly loaded about a twat or a bird. I told him to get the door on his way out. It makes sense that I know my way around a tumbl(e)r, but this “social networking” sounds exhausting. You’re asking too much. All networks support free advertising, but that doesn’t mean they’ve lost interest in quality control.
82. Dear Don Draper, What do you look for in an evening of theatre?
The easiest way out. If it’s a musical, the nearest.
